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In Grand Theft Bicycle the user sits on his or her heavily-armed Borgcycle™, faces a large projection screen, and rides his or her way to victory!

The player is given total control of his or her direction through the revolutionary Borgcycle™ interface: pedaling increases the player’s speed through the 3D environment; turning the steering wheel turns the player to the left or the right in the environment; squeezing the front brake shoots weapons; squeezing the back brake stops the bike and holding it down reverses the bike.

As the player’s skills improve by taking out more of the enemy, the Borgcycle™ becomes an even meaner killing machine, adding rocket-launchers, amour, and yes even weapons of mass destruction! Oh yeah, don’t forget to drink some Freedom Cola™ along the way. It’ll give you the energy to knock off the toughest invader or insurgent.

Naturally as the player moves farther through the game he or she will come to the attention of the baddies and their evil fundamentalist friends. Certain enemies will act as human shields for their higher-ranked pals: Tony Blair’ll take one for George W.; Saddam Hussein will drop down in front of Osama.

Grand Theft Bicycle is meant as an ironic commentary on the connection between gaming and war, but it remains an ass-kicking shooter game that will let you vent your anger at the idiots who are in command. Best yet through the revolutionary Borgcycle™, you can get rid of your flab at the same time.